Psalm 40:2

I was pulled from the mud
Many years ago
I was washed
Given new clothes
Set on a solid rock.
Yet I seek the mud
It seems cool at first
Inviting
And then it stains me
I dabble -
A smear here
Just covering my toes there
And before I know
It's pressing around me
I can't breathe
Chokes me
Then I realise
My feet are still on the rock.
I'm just pouring mud over myself.
Lord, let it rain
Wash this stupidity away.

I am clean.

Why do I seek more mud?
Again?
Instead, let me rejoice
At my new clothes
At the rock that holds me
Let me shout to those who are sinking
Come -stand on the rock
And sink no more!
I will shout joyfully
As one safe
And clean.
But why don't I?
Why do I reach instead
For another handful
Of Filth
to pour over myself?

Ready or not!

Because the ship I work on is having its annual 'Dry-dock' time of maintenance, many people are sent off the ship to work with local ministries during that time. Over the last few days I was involved in debriefing about 70 of our people who had just returned from two weeks of work with locals, then after two days of debriefing, were heading out again for two more weeks with new hosts.

The work is good but many people get very tired, and nervous about heading out again so soon.
What do you do when you have very little energy and so much is required of you?

Luke 9 was a chapter I read during my quiet time while at the debriefing. Jesus' disciples were in such a similar situation!

After seeing Jesus working miracles and demonstrating His great power, now He sends THEM out to work with HIS authority.

So they go, do amazing things, and even Herod gets to hear about it!
When they come back, they tell Jesus all about everything that happened.

He takes them to a remote place, and there they spend time with Him to debrief.
But the crowds follow. The debriefing is way too short. People are everywhere, demanding His attention, His time.

How would the disciples feel? Come on - they've just returned from their short-term mission. Now it's down-time with Jesus. Go away, people!

Of course, they can't say that straight. They're meant to love people, not shoo them off because they're tired of ministry. So they find a more plausible reason to get rid of them...

'Late in the afternoon the Twelve came to him and said, "Send the crowd away so they can go to the surrounding villages and countryside and find food and lodging, because we are in a remote place here."' - Luke 9:12

That's a good reason. They should go. We only have a bit of food, and we want Jesus for ourselves. Let them sort themselves out.

But Jesus puts a definite full-stop on their hoped-for time of rest:

He replied, "You give them something to eat." - Luke 9:13

Us??? We're exhausted! We've just come back from our mission trip! We need a break! We have nothing!

And that's the best place to be.
Jesus takes the 'nothing' they have - (after all, 5 loves and 2 fish is basically nothing when you see more than 5000 diners!) - and HE multiplies it.

Just like He multiplied the nothing they had to offer when He sent them on their mission trip.
Just like He multiplies the nothing we feel when He calls us for a task.

What excites me about this passage is how Jesus knows how much rest His disciples need. He did take them away. They did spend time with Him. But while they may have wanted longer, He knew what was enough, and He pushed them to the front again - 'YOU give them something to eat.'

The disciples gave Jesus what they had.
He multiplied it.
He gave it back to them.
They gave it out to the people.
They received back a basket each of left-overs.


Our 70ish people are out again on new teams. Yes, they're tired from the old teams, following months of very busy work in Asia. But I am confident that, like the disciples, as they give the little they have to God, He will multiply it and people will be blessed.

And He knows if we're ready or not. More than we do.

Michael Jackson?

I said goodbye to a friend at Changi Airport two days ago, and as we were walking through to the gate, we saw a crowd of screaming youngsters gathered around a stage.
Michael Jackson mania had hit the airport. An impersonator - (I should say THE impersonator - according to the MC, Michael Jackson even used him when he didn't feel like meeting people), was wowing the crowd, moonwalking and taking photos with kids who probably never knew who the original was.

I thought, 'What a life-achievement to be an impersonator. Not to be known for anything you did, but that you were very similar to someone else. What a sad goal.'

Then it struck me - while not impersonators, we are called to be IMITATORS of Christ.
I don't want people to say of me, 'She's pretending to be Jesus.' But I would love for people to live around me and be drawn to Christ, because I want to act as He would have me act. I want to remind people of Christ by modelling my life on His.

Those kids in the airport can only say that they had their photos taken with someone who looked and acted a lot like Michael Jackson.
I pray that our lives will cause people to say, 'That person pointed me to Jesus Christ Himself.'

A little gross, but...

A few days ago, walking carelessly, I nearly ripped a quarter of the nail from my big toe. The only thing keeping the damaged nail to my toe was the bright blue nail-polish that I'd thickly applied a few days before.

Before I bandaged the toe up, I could see the visible crack, covered over by the nail-polish. I had liked the nail polish before. Now I love it! It has covered over the crack and held things together. I'm very grateful, since the next day I had to fly half-way around the world, and that sans a toe-nail just isn't fun.

1 Peter 4:8 says: 'Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.'

Love is a bit like my blue nail-polish. It may not seem essential to love people, but who knows what it can cover over. I am sure that we have no idea of some of the hurts we have been spared from because we have been covered by others' love.

This makes me reflect again on the greatness of God's love. While we were yet sinners...

Paint your toes blue to prevent injuries of idiocy. Love each other deeply, and cover and protect each other with that love.

When we ask 'Why'

Today's message at church was on Habukkuk 2 - waiting for God when we don't understand why things happen.
I was leading the music, and in my preparation, I looked online for any hymns based on that chapter. (http://www.hymntime.com/tch/scr/scriptur.htm is a good resource for that, if you're a sucker for hymns like I am!)

Anyway, I found this one. Don't know how the music goes so I just read it out. But wow, what rich words:

LORD, WE KNOW THAT THOU ART NEAR US
Jane Crewd­son (1809-1863). (Written during a long illness)

Lord, we know that Thou art near us,
Though Thou seem’st to hide Thy face;
And are sure that Thou dost hear us,
Though no answer we embrace.

Not one promise shall miscarry
Not one blessing come too late
Though the vision long may tarry
Give us patience, Lord to wait.

While withholding—Thou art giving
In Thine own appointed way
And while waiting we’re receiving
Blessings suited to our day.

O the wondrous loving-kindness
Planning, working out of sight,
Bearing with us in our blindness,
Out of darkness bringing light.

Weaving blessings out of trials,
Out of grief evolving bliss;
Answering prayer by wise denials
When Thy children ask amiss.

And when faith shall end in vision,
And when prayer is lost in praise,
Then shall love, in full fruition,
Justify Thy secret ways.

Look and Remember

This Psalm has been weaving its way around me in the last few days:

Psalm 36
For the director of music. Of David the servant of the Lord.

1 An oracle is within my heart
concerning the sinfulness of the wicked:
There is no fear of God
before his eyes.

2 For in his own eyes he flatters himself
too much to detect or hate his sin.

3 The words of his mouth are wicked and deceitful;
he has ceased to be wise and to do good.

4 Even on his bed he plots evil;
he commits himself to a sinful course
and does not reject what is wrong.

How encouraging! David sees evil and he tells it like it is. I can stand outside looking out at the place I now am and read these first four verses, and they will be accurate. You could do the same.
It's reality. We live in a broken, sinful world, full of broken and sinful people.
It's depressing.

David sees the reality, but the psalm doesn't stop there. How does he respond?


5 Your love, O Lord, reaches to the heavens,
your faithfulness to the skies.

6 Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains,
your justice like the great deep.
O Lord, you preserve both man and beast.

7 How priceless is your unfailing love!
Both high and low among men
find refuge in the shadow of your wings.

8 They feast on the abundance of your house;
you give them drink from your river of delights.

9 For with you is the fountain of life;
in your light we see light.

Yes, the situation is bleak, but God is God! He loves! He is faithful! He is righteous! He is just! He is greater than anything else David could think of comparing Him to. And as we remember Who He is, we can see bleak situations in the light of His light. There is hope, because God is God!

David continues:

10 Continue your love to those who know you,
your righteousness to the upright in heart.

11 May the foot of the proud not come against me,
nor the hand of the wicked drive me away.

12 See how the evildoers lie fallen—
thrown down, not able to rise!


He still sees the darkness around him, but he asks God to remain faithful and hold him close.
The last verse can be seen in the future-tense - 'See - God will sort it out! He will!'

Be encouraged. As you look around you and see the terrible results of sin in all of society, remember.... GOD is!

Remember.

The Rivendell Duck

Memory lane time - a recent browse through my journal has reminded me of this precious lesson I learned about a year ago...

I had taken a team to where 'Rivendell' in the Lord of the Rings movies was filmed. While there, we each spent a few hours in silence in nature, open to whatever God would do.

I sat at the edge of a river, about 50 metres downstream of a swing-bridge. I had my journal with me and was feeling dry that day. Unexpectant that God would show me anything, but ready to write down whatever I saw.

Then a saw a duck at the far end of the river.

And this is when my journalling started. Here it is as I wrote it....

The Rivendell Duck

'It started off at the far side of the river, moving swiftly with the current, cleaning himself as he drifted.

Lord, is there anything this duck could teach me about life with You?

Could he visit me if there is?

Maybe half an hour has passed. He's still here. He came pretty much as soon as I had hoped for him to. I had no food. He just came, curious, to say hi.

Lord, what can this duck show me?

He cleans himself so much. But differently to me. He is home in the water. He stands on a higher rock, then cleans, dipping his bill in the water and using it on his bill to probe between his feathers, into the down, searching, grooming. Cleaning. Then another sip of the water he stands in. More cleaning.

Then his friend joins him - within arms' reach. They both clean, then both sleep - head under wings, standing in the shallow water, right by me.

Lord, what can these ducks show me?

He's still here. His friend left after about ten minutes of napping.

He has eaten a full banana, much from my hand. Now he's cleaning himself again. Always with water. In water. Dipping his bill in and letting the water clean him.

Lord, You are the life-giving stream - river of water. Through You, dead seas come alive.

The people here mince across the stream with the swing-bridge, but this duck lives in the midst of the water.

Let me live completely in You. Letting You carry me. Finding my food in You. My rest in You. And Lord, clean me. search my and by Your Spirit, Your power, remove my sin and weaknesses. Let me never try and clean with a dry bill. I need to do work, but it is You who changes me. Your water. Life-giving.

The duck is still here, within arms' reach. Thank You so much, Lord, for this precious duck. May I be in You as he is in this stream.

The swingbridge and the water. 'Ways to cross a river'

First it was the tourists. Slowly, holding onto the sides, looking ooh and aah at the river, snapping off a few photos.

Then the three older women with the dog. Cautious but triumphant, posing for a 'victory photo' just before completing the crossing.

Then the young man. No camera. Just ambling and gazing at the sun's reflection on the water's surface.

They all crossed the swing-bridge.

Dangerous.

Exciting.

Maybe ten metres above the stream. Perhaps 30 metres wide?

They all crossed over. The stream was beautiful, inviting, but beneath them.

The stream draws them, but the bridge is the best way to be close to it, to conquer it.

Then there's the braver man. Bridges? Pah! He wants to rough it, be real.

He stands only in his shorts. And wades. You can see his body tense as the water reaches his thighs. Arms high in the air. Like an orangutan, he clumsily and quickly crosses over. Too cold. Too swift. Too close for comfort. Maybe the bridge was a better idea.

Meanwhile, the water continues to flow, bringing life and the sound of refreshment.

And the whole time, my friend the duck has been in it, cleaning, drifting, hunting, scratching, visiting, sleeping.

Why cross over this enticing stream? Are we not called to plunge into it?

What's around the corner? A waterfall? A bend? Stagnation?

I'll never know by sitting on the bank or crossing to the other side.

Let the current take me. Life is an adventure of trust and mystery.

Father, consume me!

(PS - the duck stayed by my side for two hours! Then, after a few minutes away, he came back!)